The more i learn about black women, the more i realize that there is so much more i need to learn.
Fortunately i study important works on this subject, and i have had many interactions with these women so i have some semlance of what they are about and how to go about dealing with them in the most effective manner (even though it doesnt always end up that way lol).
I am writing this post and i will be writing other posts like this because for the last month i have seen men do the stupidest, craziset things that were provoked by a woman.
I was watching some judge shows a couple of weeks ago and this white guy was on there.
This dude said that he beat himself up with a beer bottle, punched himself damn near knocked himself uinconscious then called the police and told them that his girlfriend did it just to get back at her.
This one guy destrotyed this womans car because he was mad at her.
This guy that my sister is going with got mad at what my sister and put comet and bleach in the fish tanks at her house and killed the fish.
My uncle threw the christmas tree in his house and got put in jail because of an argument he had with his wife.
WHAT THE HIZNOG IS GOING ON?
I have done some things that i am not proud of over a woman too.
I dont think a real man would let a woman get them riled up like that!
I mean certainly we have to check the bitches that we interact with if they get too out of hand, but i've been through that shit and uh, I AINT GOING TO JAIL FOR NOBODY!
Brothers, there are some things you have to learn about the black woman that they are not going to tell you.
Luckily there are brave black women out there who will give you the real scoop.
If you havent met that one that almost drove you insane you might so you have to know these rules.
There are certain things that they have been trained to do by the bitter, ignorant women in their lives since they were young.
They have very very distorted and evil perceptions about black men that most brothers are not aware of (especially the afrikan american woman).
The things that i've read in the black man's guide to understanding the black woman, and have seen with my own eyes and have heard about women doing are unbelievable.
I got to get my thoughts on this together but if you want to see some real talk on how screwed up the modern day black woman is today (not just her but damn near all women who live in the united states) then stay tuned becasue im about the tell you some things that most of you might know on a subconscious level but never really thought about.
Stay tuned.
Fortunately i study important works on this subject, and i have had many interactions with these women so i have some semlance of what they are about and how to go about dealing with them in the most effective manner (even though it doesnt always end up that way lol).
I am writing this post and i will be writing other posts like this because for the last month i have seen men do the stupidest, craziset things that were provoked by a woman.
I was watching some judge shows a couple of weeks ago and this white guy was on there.
This dude said that he beat himself up with a beer bottle, punched himself damn near knocked himself uinconscious then called the police and told them that his girlfriend did it just to get back at her.
This one guy destrotyed this womans car because he was mad at her.
This guy that my sister is going with got mad at what my sister and put comet and bleach in the fish tanks at her house and killed the fish.
My uncle threw the christmas tree in his house and got put in jail because of an argument he had with his wife.
WHAT THE HIZNOG IS GOING ON?
I have done some things that i am not proud of over a woman too.
I dont think a real man would let a woman get them riled up like that!
I mean certainly we have to check the bitches that we interact with if they get too out of hand, but i've been through that shit and uh, I AINT GOING TO JAIL FOR NOBODY!
Brothers, there are some things you have to learn about the black woman that they are not going to tell you.
Luckily there are brave black women out there who will give you the real scoop.
If you havent met that one that almost drove you insane you might so you have to know these rules.
There are certain things that they have been trained to do by the bitter, ignorant women in their lives since they were young.
They have very very distorted and evil perceptions about black men that most brothers are not aware of (especially the afrikan american woman).
The things that i've read in the black man's guide to understanding the black woman, and have seen with my own eyes and have heard about women doing are unbelievable.
I got to get my thoughts on this together but if you want to see some real talk on how screwed up the modern day black woman is today (not just her but damn near all women who live in the united states) then stay tuned becasue im about the tell you some things that most of you might know on a subconscious level but never really thought about.
Stay tuned.
Get schooled moron:
ReplyDelete5 Mistakes Women Make - By Ekene Agabu [male]
Before I begin or rather let you into what I have written, I must confess that I had completed this article months ago but was a bit apprehensive in publishing it. I didn’t want to come across as being judgmental and if after reading this you feel judged or put down as a woman, please excuse my unskilled delivery, for that is not my intent. And if you feel that I have crossed the line as man sharing these with you, do not hesitate to express your disdain for my impetus.
Having said that, I feel qualified to write this as a man because I stand as an unbiased observer and also one who has had the opportunity to take advantage of these mistakes. But I must confess, we as men have been @$$#*%*$ . Where we should have given, we took; where we should have loved, we lusted and where we should have preserved, we devoured. As a Man, I must call myself to higher standards. Before I touch you, I must respect you like my mother, protect you like my sister and look out for your best interest like my baby – after all, that’s what I call you when I want you! We’ve failed to realize that the significance of our masculinity does not lie in how many girls we can dis-virgin but rather the honor we can bestow upon one. We fail to understand that the purpose of our strength and dominance is to defend and protect not to attack and destroy.
But the first mistake was not yours. You were born into a world that didn’t even give you the chance - the chance to be who you really are without any pressure or expectation. From day one you were unconsciously groomed from childhood to be an acceptable accessory to a man’s life. You were constantly made conscious of a false milestone that suggested your value was based upon a man finding you worthy to be his, instead of being made aware of who you are by virtue of your own unique existence. Your worth as a woman was reduced to two things; being a wife and your ability to bear a child – and in some cultures, you had to bear the right type of child. And if per chance you failed in one of these areas, you were nobody, no one – you were nothing.
Unfortunately, along the way, you may have made some mistakes in trying to fulfill this false notion of who you are supposed to be. Bad relationship after bad relationship continually emphasized the lie that you were nothing without a man. Not only do you sit there as one with mental wounds from childhood, but also with hurts and wounds that are self inflicted as you sincerely tried to fulfill the so called destiny of the woman – being someone’s woman.
ReplyDeleteAs I share this with you, I do not come as one who claims to understand your plight, but rather I stand as one who has heard you. From my mother to my aunts to my cousins and my friends, I have heard you and will continue to listen whenever you speak.
That being said, I do not believe we are responsible for the things that are done or said to us, but I do know that we are responsible for allowing those things continue in us. It’s in this light that I share with you the five common mistakes women make in relationships.
Your Personal Standards! Don't leave home without them!
By not setting your standard, you’ve just set the standard. The standards I speak of are not standards for the relationship; I speak of your personal standards irrespective of the relationship. What is your life’s moral compass? This could get a bit confusing, so let me explain. Often times, at a certain point in life, people turn to religion for some sort of moral guidance or law. It’s an acknowledgment of some sort that they have made numerous personal mistakes and are in probable search for a turn around. So you might have a young lady who’s been around the block and has now become a Christian, and professes that she will be celibate until she gets married thereby claiming this new belief to be her standard. This is a religious belief that she has now adopted and not a personal standard. Your personal standards are born and realized from within you and become your principles rather than a law. A principle is born out of understanding; an understanding of who you are and why you are here on this earth. If you are roaming the earth like a lost sheep in search of a man to give you relevance, you will always find yourself jumping from relationship to relationship with each one leaving you even more confused than you were in the beginning. But when you understand that you are not here by chance and your presence on this earth has significant relevance, the aura about you changes and the people and things you accept into your life will only be a reflection of your internal essence or your personal standard. A man can cause you to go against a belief because it was never yours in the first place, but he can never sway you away from your principle because you are one with your principle. A lady who lives from her principles takes personal responsibility for her own actions and responses. She takes charge and never leaves her fate to the opinions or actions of men. She doesn’t go on a date with every man that asks her out because she doesn’t need a man – she would want a man but she fully well understands that her worth is solely appraised on who she is and not who she’s with. She would not change her principle to have or keep a man. She’s doesn’t need to sleep with a man to have or keep him. She understands that whatever she can’t get by way of her principles will never be her own. That you are sleeping with a guy does not mean he’s yours. If you had to sleep with him to keep him, he was never yours in the first place. In the absence of your personal standards, you end up trying many things and many people, but you never experience the love that is already within you. Allow that love within to write your standards and begin to live from them. That love will never lead you astray, never ever!
Why are you making excuses for him…..again?
ReplyDeleteI have come to observe that ladies often see the man as the prize. So once it looks like they have him – especially if he appears to be a good one – they want to do everything in their power to keep him. I understand that, but I don’t accept that and neither should you. You are the Prize. We should fight over you and want to do things to get and keep you. We should want to make sure you are ok. A man who loves and respects a woman will never want her in doubt when it comes her knowing of his feelings towards her. When we are crazy about a woman, we are no longer the reserved and non emotional creatures you think we are. We become a mess - drooling internally when we think of you. We would never want you to feel you are on shaky ground concerning your status with us. We will publicly profess and show you to the whole world. We will put up a picture with you in it as the our profile pic, tag you in all photos you appear in and most importantly make sure that our status box shows that we are in a relationship with you. Yup, that’s what we do when we love you - we say it out LOUD! And when we are out and about with you, our professions are usually crystal clear: ‘Meet my girlfriend, Sandra’ or ‘Meet my fiance, Sandra.’ Not, ‘Meet Sandra’ who is Sandra??? When we love you, we want the world to know that we love you. But I get amazed when ladies see the writing on the wall and continually make excuses to justify a man’s blatant abuse towards them. What do I mean? Take for instance the introductions highlighted above; He introduces you as just ‘Sandra’: you know you don’t like it, but you make an excuse within yourself and say, ‘he’s a private kinda guy, he doesn’t like to publicly show stuff.’ Really? Ok, let me ask, “Are you enrolled in midnight gymnastics with him?” In other words has he bent your body in ways you didn’t think possible? Well, there is only one thing worse than a guy sleeping with a woman in secret; and that is, a woman allowing that to happen. Before you allow a man do to you privately what can affect you publicly, he must first of all acknowledge you publicly as the woman he respects and loves. If he can’t do that, you need to tell me why you are still sticking around. How can you allow a man to knock you up when you are just ‘Sandra’ to him? You know you deserve better, so stop the excuses. Instead of making excuses for him, take charge – not of him or the relationship, but of yourself. Never remain in an environment where your integrity is compromised. Remember, you are the prize and we should work hard to get and keep you. And after all our hard work, you still have a right to say NO.
Why are you looking for ‘something’ in a bag of ‘nothings?’
ReplyDeleteA few years ago, a friend who was engaged was getting ready for her wedding which was just a couple of months away at the time. She called me occasionally during the preparation process, but on this one phone call, things were pretty bad. She was mad, upset, disappointed and unhappy that she was marrying this guy. So I asked her why she was still going on with the wedding if she felt the marriage wouldn’t work out. She said to me that she did not want the last four years of her life spent with him to go to waste. Hmmm! When she said this, I looked at my phone because I couldn’t look at her (she was in a different city) and in that instant – if I had a private jet – I would have flown to her city to give her a knock on her head - not a hard one, just a gentle knock - to help tilt her brain back to the center of her skull, because obviously it seemed out of balance with what she had just said to me. Let’s think about this, You are willing to screw up the next 50 years of your life, create babies in a hostile environment with a man you despise thereby screwing up the next generation, raising kids that would need therapy for the rest of their lives based on the abuse they will experience in that home, all because you don’t want the last four years of your life - 1,2,3,4 - to mean nothing (I’m having a headache just rehashing the story). So you are trying to create a love marriage from a four year crappy relationship. Needless to say, this lady was a young beautiful 28yr old lawyer. With good life habits she could easily live another healthy 50 years (Have you seen Barbara Walters lately? She’s 80). And here you are, willing to mortgage a future on four years with this jerk? She was desperately trying to make something out of nothing. That you’ve been in a long term relationship does not mean you should continually stay in it. Unfortunately for some ladies, it takes a while to see the light and muster up courage to get out of a bad situation. But when you see the light; RUN, GO, your life deserves it. If you don’t make that change, you’ll never know what’s out there? And when I say out there, I don’t mean what’s out there in another relationship; I mean what’s out there in you that you are yet to discover. Some of you ladies are afraid – afraid that you might not be married by a certain time. You begin the calculations, ‘Ok, I’m 28 now, if I break this up, how long will it take to find another guy and get married? Oooh! It may take another 4 years and I’ll be 32. No! I can’t be single at 30.” You are killing yourself with this kind of dialogue. Like she later said to me, she always saw herself married by 29. Needless to say, she was divorced by 29. They got married alright, but their divorce was made final before a possible 1st wedding anniversary. Sometimes we allow fear to dictate what we should do. We will never get from fear what love has to give. Love is bold, confident and fearless. Why are you scared? Why are you letting fear keep you in a relationship that you know you don’t want? Why do you want to marry a guy who has already made you feel like trash? Why are you choosing to be with someone you are not crazy about? Ok, so you are more concerned about looking good and successful on the outside at the expense of how you truly feel on the inside. You are too special for that. Let people think what they think, you know what you know and that’s all that should matter. Sometimes, we don’t believe; we don’t believe in ourselves, so we settle and then try to make something out of nothing. You can’t change another human being, it’s impossible. You haven’t even changed some things about yourself; how then do you think it possible to change another?
You’ve gotta think before you have his baby!
ReplyDeleteOften times when I’m in conversation with one of my numerous lady friends, something always cracks me up. I know they been having sex for years in and out of relationships and that fact is not hidden between us. But on some occasions, when I ask them if they have been pregnant before, their voice takes on a new tone of ‘How dare you?’ And then there is a resounding NO, like, ‘how could I get pregnant?’ Wait a minute! Am I missing something here? If you are having sex – sexual intercourse, you are potentially making a baby. You are filing an application. As soon as he ejaculates into you, the application is submitted and the outcome of that process is no longer left to you or him but to the Department of Conception. And if they approve it, you become pregnant whether you want it or not. Sex is not just about the pleasure derived, neither is it an antidote for loneliness. Sex is Responsibility; meaning you will have to respond to the outcome of that sexual encounter and sometimes it could be a lifetime of responses especially when a child is conceived. And when that child is born, you will forever have a symbol representing your union with your ex. Once a child is conceived, there is no moving on from that relationship. It begins the strongest bond known between a man and a woman. That man holds a special place in your heart regardless of how you feel about him today. You may have an abortion in trying to cut any future ties to this man, but may I have you know that the power of conception outweighs the power of birth. For something to be born, it has to be conceived. We are all on this earth first because of conception then birth. Without conception they will be no birth but without birth there can be conception. A strong bond is created when you allow a man’s sperm to start life within you. It is a major privilege to give to someone and not everyone should have that kind of access to you. If a man is horny and wants to be relieved, tell him to use his hand. You are no object and certainly no substitute for a man’s hand. So if you don’t want to have his baby, don’t make his baby.
I know there’s Pressure, but why are you under it?
I have come to observe that whether she’s 21 or 29, she always feels she’s running out of time. One thing you must understand is that pressure is not real. You are real and when you give attention to or come under the dominance of something that is impotent, you give it potency – you give it power. That is why this thing we call ‘pressure’ has the effect it has. You give it the effect. You are the effect. Sometimes we are driven by those voices of ignorance that may have come from people we love, so we try hard to get into a relationship and make it work. “Oh! This one has to work cos I’m almost 30.” Screw him and screw 30. You are more valuable to yourself and to the world than the timeline of your eggs or your age. Your world will not come to an end if you are not married by 30; in fact, it may just be beginning!
Have we as men failed you? Oh yes we have! As fathers some of us weren’t present in your young life. As uncles, instead of being fond of you, we fondled you. As friends we were more focused on the benefits instead of the sacrifice. We used you when we should have added value. We took advantage instead giving the advantage. We failed you quite all right, but you don’t have to do to yourself what we did to you – You don’t have to fail yourself. You can’t afford to fail yourself. You are the door to humanity. Life has to go through you to enter this earth. Even God needed a woman to come back into the world.
There’s no need to dumb yourself down or compromise your true integrity. We need the true you. We can’t exist without you and we will adjust to whatever standard you set for us – so why not make it high, why not make it YOU?
SO, I THINK IT’S IMPORTANT YOU GATHER WISDOM FROM OTHER PEOPLE. STOP GETTING SCARED OF WHAT YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT. GET ADVICE, SEEK SOLUTION, STOP BEING A MORON. THIS BLOG IS NOT ABOUT HELPING PROFER SOLUTION, IS ALL ABOUT VENTING AND DISPLAYING HOW MISERABLE YOU ARE.
ReplyDeleteWOMEN CANNOT BE CONTROLLED TO SUBMIT TO WIMPS OF MEN. THEY HAVE TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT AND SEEING AS PARTNERS. IF YOU DON’T AGREE, GET A WOMAN, CONTROL HER AND FORCE HER TO SUBMIT TO YOU AS A SLAVE, THEN COME BACK AND TELL ME IF YOUR MARRIAGE WILL LAST 1 YR! WELL, YOU ARE JUST 28, BY THE TIME YOU ARE 30, U WLD HAVE RECORDED 3 DIVORCES AND THE WOMEN IN QUESTION WILL TAKE AWAY THIER KIDS FROM YOU AND IT WILL DAWN ON YOU THAT IT’S THEIR KIDS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
THE MODERN DAY BLACK WOMEN ARE WISER, THEY ARE BETTER OF, THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT AND THEY WILL NOT SETLLE FOR A MISERABLE BOY LIKE YOU OR WHOEVER SHARES HIS IDEA WITH YOU.
PLS STOP BEING FULL OF SHIT, DEAL WITH YOUR ISSUES, STOP VENTING, STOP HATING, GET HEALED!